The
Guide
by
Ashvin Varghese.
NO.8
Guess who’s back, back again, TheGuide is back tell a friend. Yes, I know that did not rhyme for nuts but I am the “bawsss” and I hope you kind people would not mind my eccentric antics. On a much lighter note welcome back ladies and gentleman, yours truly is back again indeed with some mind boggling, brain teasing, mouth-watering and thirst quenching information on my social experiment. Once again I have put my sovereign ass out there for you grateful people to read and be enlightened in the social interaction department of your being, so pay full attention.
I must say that am
feeling rather fidgety as I am writing this; I guess it’s the raw power of the coffee that I am sipping
now (black no sugar). Back to business, our journey this time will be rather
interesting as I managed to get some honest opinions and views on typical
social related standpoints form two interesting individuals who happened to be
the best of friends. I guess you can refer to this edition of TheGuide as the, “BFF” special for
obvious reasons of course. I am going to write this, “BFF” special in two
parts, hence No.8 and No.9 are in essence going to complement
one another and is meant to be read together in succession. Nevertheless these
are two separate people so I will write them based on the visual appearance and
characteristics that I found in these ladies.
As always for the purpose of vivid
storytelling, I will give you guys a summary on my epic social conquest for the
day. First things first, my attire for the day, Well I know I am supposed to
dress up like a typical average guy when approaching women just to prove that
average dressed guys can approach stunning foxes. That being said I admit that
I have not been following that concept lately and I guess I should apologize
for this, however there is still no change this time. I’d like to assume that I
dressed up rather skankily by wearing a body gripping long sleeve t-shirt which
defines my rather large sculpted chest. I just wanted reap the benefits of my
fitness regime by flaunting my blood sweat and tears. My main intention was to
show of my guns but B1, (yup B1 and B2 tagged along this time as well), lamented
that my arms looks to thin compared to my chest thus making me look like some
kind of deformed ape, what a real boost of confidence.
This time I decided to
look for potential candidates around universities, I assume that the studying
class will have more time to spare and will be more open for me to document
their opinions. I decided to go back to my roots, to the palace where I
acquired my higher education. It so happens to be the Holy Grail in find
beautiful up and comers since it’s surrounded with universities, am I doing a
good job at teasing you? Fear not, the palace is the famous/infamous “SS 15”.
Okay so here I am all
excited at this what I assume to be a holy grail of a place, I walk along the prestigious
universities and I say to myself, “where will all people( tsk girls) be grouped
at”, the answer comes back immediately, “ AC, the famous Asia Café”. So I am
like Johnny Bravo here, “Hey Foxy Mama, You smell kinda pretty. Wanna smell me?
Hoohah!” That has to be one of the best lines he has ever said. Yeah, so I am
all hyped up like that as I stroll into AC with my buddies B1 and B2. My
excitement was however short lived as AC was nearly empty and this gave me a
feeling that I was going to have Johnny Bravo’s success rate that in which is
well quite abysmal.
I found out that most
of the university occupants were on semester break and this was horrible for me,
“no sorry horrible for you guys”. B1 and B2 did not seem quite pleased at our
impending failure. I am sure you guys reading are keen with my sense of optimism.
I shrugged the vast emptiness of AC and decided to just have something to eat
there and let vivid past memories of this place flourish my mind. I met up with
an old comrade of mine whom studied with me at the time when I was there and we
decided to sit at our regular table at AC. My optimism once again pays off as
we spot two interesting looking ladies sitting at a table close to us having
lunch. I don’t want to repeat history again by interrupting people while they
eat, so I held back on an approach. B1 and B2 had other ideas and insisted on approaching
and B2 wanted to lead and take the mantle of approaching women. I was quite
happy at this notion as it’s like a parent seeing their children finally
growing up. B2 unfortunately took too much time and fumbled. One word of advice
guys, never take too long at approaching a women. You will end up talking yourself
out it and this will evidently make your self-looking like a total tool.
Instantaneously I got up
from my table and charmingly approached these gorgeous ladies with my usual, “hey
sexy mama” routine (entirely fiction). After getting acquainted and comfortable
with each other, they tell me that my approach startled them. Guess the “hey
sexy mama” routine needs a lot of improvement. Anyway I explain to them more
about TheGuide and they get hooked
onto the idea and agree to participate in it. My excitement gets back on track.
I get some kind of thrill while I interview ladies. This gives me the
impression that I got to do this professionally. We talk for another 15 minutes
on social related issues while doing this I try analyse on what kind characters
I am dealing with here. I decide to interview them separately thus one will be No.8 and the other No.9, I went with their age gap here with the younger being the
latter.
Ladies and genitals,
lets commence the “BFF” special by getting to know No.8. At my first approach based on her body language I would say
No.8 was the more dominant one out of this pair of besties. No.8 has a kind of animated
aura that surrounds her, sort of like a live wire which is very good. This
gives out the impression that you can have very long conversations with her that
will not end up with anyone getting bored, which is always a plus. So bottom line
is this woman packs some entertainment. No.8 also happens to be at the ripe age
of 22 and is yet another aspiring accounts student. Sooooo many women in
accounts, why????, Hopefully not for obvious reasons.
Now let’s get physical
cause apparently that shit matters. No.8 ranks at the number 2(A notch above
attractive) on the attractive index. Accompanied with her enticing character,
No.8 fairs pretty well in the genetic gene pool. Healthy lush black hair
crowned on top a supple face, which is always a bonus. From the neck down, well
let’s just give it a capital C for curves, or as how Borat would say it, “VERY
NICE”. Now for the love of god let’s get to where it matters:
Q&A Session
1. What do you think about Malaysian
men? Give your personal opinion based on your experience thus far.
No.8 gets straight to the point with this
question. She politely highlights the racial differences between Malaysian men.
First up, Indian guys, based on her experience she finds that Indian dudes tend
to be smooth talkers, meaning that they will be as sweet as sugar during the
initial stages of a relationship and end up getting sour as time goes by. Chinese
dudes on the other hand tend to be more laid back towards a relationship, she elaborates
this in a sense that Chinese guys give their women much more freedom in a
relationship. I see. Unfortunately she has no experience with any Malay dudes,
fair enough I guess. 1 Malaysia attempt status failed here.
2. Based
on your experience do you find it hard for guys to approach you?
No.8 laments that social media has killed
face to face interaction. She concludes that most guys approach her on Facebook.
In that aspect I guess you can say she is approachable.
3. What
are your opinions of “kissing on a first date?”
No.8 does not recommend on kissing on
the first date. She feels that kissing on the first date will give the guy a
wrong impression. It defeats the element of curiosity and ultimately spoils the
fun of courting a lady. Guys I must say she makes a constructive argument here.
Flirting is Fun!
4. What
kind of stereotype would you like to change that you think Malaysian men have
No.8 personally thinks that us guys tend
to judge woman too much based on the way they dress, the way they walk and/or
the way they carry them self. She finds it a very shallow and immature way of
putting a label on some one. People should not be judged based on what they
wear and the way they walk. In essence never be too quick to judge a book by
its cover, we live in a hypocritical world after all.
5. Do
you find it offensive when guys watch porn
No.8 finds it very offensive when guys watch porn. She
describes it as very unhygienic. I guess it’s unhygienic in a sense but that
depends on, let’s not go there…
Bonus Question
1.
What
are your opinions on breast implants?
No.8 says that this is ultimately a person’s choice
and she would not judge them if they choose to get implants. She however feels
that breast implants are unsafe and is very much grateful for her naturally
grown pair which are how should I put this decent in size.
Yes I know I downsized
the question count as I am trying out new approaches in writing. My word count
is still amazingly high though but nevertheless please let me know what you
think about it thus far. Your opinions and views matter. I must say that this
is the end for the first part of the “BFF” special. Part 2 will be right after
this and will be the conclusion of my adventures in this epic saga. I would
like to thank No.8 for her precious time and most importantly to entertain me
while she was eating. I got to change this habit. No.8 was most certainly quite
an entertaining character and I hope you guys enjoyed the read. The next one is
more fun, don’t trust me!
THE END.
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