The
Guide
by
Ashvin Varghese.
NO.7
“They see me rollin they hatin, patrolling they tryin to catch me ridin dirty”. God I love that song. It’s so full of SWAGGG. Yes, hello people I’mma back and I hope all of you wonderful citizens are healthy, happy and horny, don’t crucify for the last one as I’m keeping it real. My writing style for this edition/episode is influenced by the pseudo nature that I took on for this adventure and it does not reflect my unpredictable yet suave personality.
Okay this time I am back to my scouting endeavours in the dense ocean of people in Kuala Lumpur. I decided to take a break from the civil concept of the TEA session interviews because some of you insist that I should put myself out there and interview random strangers, more thrilling its seems. So that’s what I did but this time I brought along two friends (brothers to each other) who happened to be my training partners or more commonly known as gym buddies, who also seemed rather interested in my social experiment. Let’s refer to them as B1 and B2 because the Bananas in Pyjamas are awesome. These two will be part of another blog that I will soon create specially for local fitness enthusiasts, because I care for all of you and finding good tips that suit our needs in this country can be rather tricky.
After much pondering I and my buddies decided to head to a rather exquisite and international scene, PAVILION in KL. I have never conducted any interviews there before so it was a new experience for me moreover this time I have a so called entourage tagging along. I dressed up rather sharply, sleek black shirt with a decent navy blue jeans and a dash of DUNHILL DESIRE, which happens to be my favourite fragrance in a bottle. Amped with material confidence I wanted to raise the bar by looking for someone international, since I have been getting informative feedback from them. Let’s get back to the way I started my first paragraph, imagine me prancing smoothly like the pink panther around Pavilion with that song (which the lyrics belong to) as the back ground music. That entire scenario played out well in my imagination.
Fifteen minutes in walking around Pavilion looking for someone worthy to interview and both B1 and B2 start to get agitated and this led them to start coaxing me into every libido stimulating women they find. I found this to be a hindrance to my natural approach. Eventually I lost my enthusiasm and therefore decided to take a break by having a drink at the food court. I felt a wave of disappointment at this point for not being able to approach a single fox. I started to feel like this was just one of those days and I’d better accept it and try another time. I have come to understand from the experiences in my life that my luck always changes whenever I decide to give up.
We managed to find a rather cozy spot to rest our behinds at the food court. Oblivious to me, B1 with his eagle eyed vision spotted two European women sitting behind us; He gave me the nod indicating that I should seize the moment. Without hesitating, I woke up and danced my way to the table behind me. I introduced myself rather charmingly with my usual, “Hello I am not trying to sell you anything and I don’t bite” line. As always it worked and I went on to state my intention and start up some casual chatter. One of the ladies was from Germany and the other was English. Two minutes in and they actually agreed to do the interview but as soon as I pulled out the information slip for them to fill in, their entire demeanour changed. I did mention that the interviews are anonymous and I needed at least some kind of means to contact them so I could let them know when I updated my blog and for them to rate themselves on the attractive index. They did not take this too well and started to treat me like some kind of human trafficker.
I ended up laughing on the insides because of the looks they were giving me. Feeling really uneasy with their stares and weird body language I decided to eject myself from this pickle. I wished that they would have a wonderful stay in Malaysia and scooted off back to my table. Either the way I presented my self was abysmal or they just could not fathom my unconventional good looks. Nevertheless it was a good experience. I took this as a positive sign and went on looking for someone to interview. While wandering around the food court I spotted this really good looking couple having dinner together, they seemed like a decent bunch so I decide to try my luck and present myself. How terrible of me for invading a couple in the middle of dinner right? I am doing this in the name of social science and it’s a worthy cause.
I decided to take B1 along with me as my so called wing man and/or/because it just seems cooler to go as a duo (AV and B1 Oo). The both of us approached this couple rather calmly and did the usual introduction. This my first experience at having a so called wing man tagging along and boy was it helpful. This was also the second time that I have approached a couple and thankfully it went extremely well. They agreed to do the interview, and thus I had my No.7. Her boyfriend was extremely insightful and informative to especially when it came to fitness related questions since he is an aspiring bodybuilder.
Without wasting any more time let’s get acquainted to No.7. At a glance No.7 poses a unique and subtle attractiveness like a calm sea with the sunset as the backdrop. She indeed has very likeable features for a woman such a curvaceous posture that goes really well with her height, wavy hair that has a decent amount of volume which is always good in my book. What else am I missing, oh yes the best part of her physical attractiveness in my opinion has to be a pleasant smile and her supple bronze complexion. Sometimes a really well genetically constructed smile trumps a developed pair of boobies or a well-toned bum, aaanddddd I am going off topic. That aside I really did not have a meaningful conversation with her (really did not want to delay their private time) so it’s hard for me to access her intellectual characteristics. She is however a MBBS student and she at a ripe age 21. She rates at the No.2 on the attractive index (A notch above attractive). I am starting to get a picture that guys will voluntarily get sick just to get the chance to be around her ( as a patient that is). Long story short, this is one hot doctor in the making so let’s find out what she thinks of us Malaysian men:
Q&A Session
1.
What’s your Ideal guy?
The ideal man for this future doctor is
some one that is honest, a man that values himself and most importantly his
word. Apparently this appeals to her a lot. I guess it’s safe to assume that honesty
is an attractive trait (coughs* policy).
2. Based
on your experience do you find it hard for guys to approach you?
No.7 claims that she finds it very hard for guys to approach her. She feels it’s because of her shy persona (I
disagree). No.7 also adds that most guys tend to talk behind her back and often
make negative remarks about her just because she does not socialize. I am
sensing some stereotypical mind-sets here. I hope change is upon us!
3.
What is your favourite body part in
the male anatomy?
Arms, No.7 finds that really distracting,
I look at her BF and he has big guns alright. Okay that’s it, its official
every women I ask this question to gives me this answer. (Second most popular
answer is the chest). Work on those guns guys.
4.
Do
you find it offensive when guys watch porn?
No. 7 finds this behaviour to be
disgusting in her opinion. When asked what she would do if she caught her
boyfriend watching it, she replied by saying that she would pretend that it
never happened. She says that this behaviour is natural then gives me the
impression that women should accept men the way they are. A rather calculated
taught.
5.
What is the lamest pick up line has
a guy used on you?
Well the following is technically not a
pick up line but she did give some interesting answers. No. 7 has experienced
guys come to her and inquire about her relationship status or more accurately
pull the, “So how’s your boyfriend line”. Guys, never inquire about a women’s
relationship status or use the following line above if you are not close to
her. In my experience a women that loves her man will bring it up without
anyone asking. Build a solid rapport then spring that line like a Bawssss.
6.
Love at first sight or lust at
first sight, why?
The answer to this raised my eyebrows. No.7 bluntly
said love at first sight. Now that’s a first. I was not expecting this reply,
so I had to inquire more. No.7 glances at her boyfriend across the table and
continues to tell me her romantic story of their relationship (which will be
summarized of course). No.7 is a shy and reserved person. This in turn means
that she rarely socializes with the opposite, but then came along prince
charming riding his virtual horse called Facebook. What started out from a simple friend request
blossomed into a fruitful relationship. No.7 tells me that she did not really
pay attention to the appearance of her boyfriend initially (3 months or so). I
asked her again if she really did feel love initially and I got back a swift
yes. This virtual conquest lasted for a year before they actually decided to
meet in person. That’s impressive and quite romantic; I might write a screen
play if I knew how to write one. The conclusion, I guess Love at first sight or in this case first impressions do exist or
at least form the experience of No.7. There is hope people.
There we go, that’s it. I know that it’s not the usual ten questions, I did ask her more questions but the ones that are above proved to be the most substantial, especially the last one. I would like to thank No.7 and her boyfriend for really sparing me the time and patience to let me interview them. A shout out to No.7’s boyfriend who gave me and my buddies some tips for my upcoming fitness and nutrition blog, so a big thanks to him. Oh and I hope my entourage (B1 and B2) had fun tagging along as it was a new experience for the both of us. Seems like another cool concept for me to explore more into, the Wing Man Chronicles maybe.
Lastly, I would like to bring up the an announcement that my next update will be a summary of my experiences thus far and I will also tabulate the results from some of my interesting and topic stimulating questions for your convenience. I hope you enjoy this read, till next time. Ciao.
