No.2

The Guide

by Ashvin Varghese

No.2

     Welcome back to my extraordinary social conquest. As promised, I am here to deliver the next attractive personality. Before I get to the curiosity stimulating bits, let me start summarizing my scouting endeavours for the day. Today was really a busy day for me, had to do many adult obligating responsibilities. Grow up they said! Be responsible they said! Thankfully I have some generous free time to spare which allows me to write this and indefinitely spares me from the clutches of evil (cough*boredom*cough).

      Due to my busy schedule my scouting time slot was limited. Never the less I did my duty with utmost enthusiasm. My area of operations for today was in Brickfields, around 5 o’clock in the evening. Being of the same ethnicity as the major populous in the area I decided to use my natural god gifted charm to approach the ladies. I was dressed semi-formally; long sleeve black shirt (folded), jeans and a leather sling bag that I hope gave me a writer’s esque.

      I went scouting with my head held up high, but to my dismay the first 45 minutes was quite a terrible experience for me. I guess my appeal or the way I approach women really needs to be revised. Man did I have a tough time; one woman even started walking briskly in the opposite direction when I moved in to present myself. I don’t think any sane man would want that to ever happen to them. I could virtually feel my ego shatter into tiny pieces.

     Anyhow, I scooped up my ego and decided that I was having one of those seriously fu**** up days, so I called it quits and decided to go have dinner. It was around 6 ish, I know it’s early for dinner but I kind of eat 6 times a day, part of my fitness mantra. At the place where I had dinner (no names mentioned) my luck changed. As I remember correctly my eyes were fixated on my plate filled with a mouth-watering assortment of Indian culinary mastery. Hope you guys get the envious image in mind! Anyway I casually glanced around and boom I notice this good looking couple walking in the place. I take better notice to the couple especially the better half and she appears to look the part. Forgive me for my bad table manners but I had a non-productive day so far so I taught to myself, “ehh, what heck”. I left my savoury meal half way and proceeded to approach the couple.

     I walked over and presented myself (I think I stuttered a few times), I explained my concept and idea then asked them if I could take 2 minutes of their time (which ended up being 15 minutes). I would like to think my approach and presentation went well because they accepted to do the interview (well she entirely did). I’d like to point out that the couple were dating and the guy (No.2’s bf) turned out to be open to my idea. He gave some good perspectives too. Without wasting any more time, I think we should get to the interview.

     At first glance I think many men would find No.2 rather attractive. In my book, she has this sweet and charismatic look. I guess the one word that best describes her is straight old PRETTY. She can pass out to be a doctor or an accountant, she so happens to be studying to be one. She has wavy hair (medium length) to compliment with her good facial attributes. I am thinking Jessica Biel form 7^th for you guys to get a better picture of her. Before I get carried away describing her beauty and somehow infuriate her charming boyfriend, I think we should get to the interview.

     On the attractive index No.2 rates ironically at number 2 which is “A notch above attractive”. Moving on to the financial index, she places herself at the level to live comfortably which rates at, well number 2. I am starting to get the impression that she suits this pseudonym. After getting to know her a bit more I moved on to give her questionnaire that I structured. This questionnaire compromises of 10 core questions and 1 bonus question. Here goes;

Q&A Session

1.                  What do you think about Malaysian men? Give your personal opinion based on your experience thus far.

She takes a few moments to ponder and then comes up with a straight answer. GUYS ARE TO INDIRECT. Guys, I hope you’re paying attention. She says that from her experience, guys that have tried approaching her in the past were too in indirect. In essence, this means that the guys that were hitting on her were asking questions of no importance and completely unrelated to their intention. After a while it gets annoying and childish I assume. She seems like a no-nonsense person. Go hard or go home guys, but be subtle and romantic in the process. Rather interesting insight already.

2.                  Based on your experience do you find it hard for guys to approach you?

She reads this question and then smiles a little; she says that she finds herself approachable. This I can vouch for, I give an inquisitive look to her boyfriend to get some clarification and he gives me a grin in reply. I’ll take that as a yes.

3.                  What’s your Ideal guy?

The common question, but deep down every guy wants to know what kind of man a woman wants. She takes her time with this question; she concludes that at this very moment (I guessing this is subjected to change in the future) her ideal man is someone who she describes as a balanced individual, A man who is motivated, someone who has the same interests as her and someone who respects elders. She says that the way a guy treats other people shows a lot about his character.

4.                  Based on your attractive appeal, has a guy approached you negatively?

5.                  In your experience what is the worst way has a guy approached you?

Her answer represents questions 4 and 5. She says that her worst experience she had with a guy, was when a random Chinese (I am not trying to be racist, this are just real world scenarios) guy started degrading her for the way she looked. This really baffled me, I don’t know if this is even considered an approach. I think I don’t have to describe the way No.2 looks again but approaching a girl like this is absurd. In fact never approach anyone like this!

6.                  What do you think will put you off when a guy tries to approach you?

BODY ODOR! Yes gentlemen please take grooming seriously. This woman likes her man to smell nice and dress well (nothing fancy).It seems your looks don’t matter as much as the way you smell. So here is a tip, break the bank and get yourself a nice bottle of cologne.

7.                  Do you find it offensive when guys comment on how much makeup you wear?

She answers this with a stern YES. She says that women have the right to look presentable. It’s sort of their obligation. Some women might want to conceal a skin condition with some added makeup. So don’t be too quick to judge. Strangers do not have the right to pass such comments directly to a women’s face. It’s offensive! That’s a strong opinion. Hope you all you curious readers pay attention.

8.                  In real world Malaysia how would you like a guy to approach or court you?

The answer for this is similar to the answer for question no.1. She wants a guy not to beat around the bush. Be direct, state your intentions creatively without being to blunt.

9.                  What kind of stereotype would you like to change that you think Malaysian men have?

She strongly wants to change the stereotype surrounding short or hot pants. Apparently men think that girls who wear short pants tend to show off their sexuality, huh really? I got to admit sometimes looking; no glancing at women who wear short pants really makes my heart start racing. I admire shorts, I mean legs, I mean women who wear shorts. Anyway No.2 wants guys to know that the current climate is dessert-like and wearing short/hot pants helps keep the heat tolerable. So she wants to stop being a potty mouth about it. I strongly agree with her, my personal opinion is that everyone should keep an open mind and enjoy them, if you know what I mean.

10.              The Stigma, when a guy sleeps around, many social circles will consider him some kind of hero or respect his exploits and he will still be accepted by the community. Women on the other hand will get a baptism of fire from both sexes. In most cases the biggest critic will be a woman. What is your say on this?

No.2 strongly disagrees with this mentality. On the part of women being the more critical critic, she says that some women tend to seek refuge in belittling other women in order to make them self-feel better. It’s psychology after all. She adds that another reason woman tend to be like this is because of the pleasure of gossiping. This statement made me laugh.

 Last but not least, the bonus question: Love at first sight or lust at first sight, why?

No.2 strongly believes it’s always lust at first sight. I opened this question to both No.2 and her boyfriend and both of them agree that this is the case.  Love at first sight rarely or never happens. They think that physical attraction is almost always the corner stone of every relationship.

    That question concludes my interview with No.2. Hopefully all the insights will come in handy to you guys. I think that this interview was a success and would like to thank No.2 and her boyfriend for graciously allowing me the time for this interview and would like to wish them the best of luck for their future endeavours. I hope all you readers enjoyed the read and hope that you do continue to read more of my upcoming interviews. Feel free to give me any comments or feedback on this blog. Till next time.

The Guide Intro

The Guide

by Ashvin Varghese.

     Are women really that hard to approach or to talk to, especially if their testament of immaculate divine engineering. Try to picture a fine specimen of a woman, let’s say casually walking around a mall. With that picture in mind try to amplify the surroundings a little, I would like to think that the energy created by the pool of guys that steal glances or blatantly start staring at her would set off a nuclear bomb. Now that being said I surely hope you guys get the REAL impression that women are the epitome of sensuality, so let’s start getting to the reality of things, how does one APPROACH Aphrodite. In my humble personal opinion approaching a gorgeous fox is the hard part.  

     I consider myself an aspiring up and comer, you know the average Joe. Like me, I’m sure there are loads of guys in our beloved country who share the same opinion about themselves. That’s nice and all but how does this tango with trying to get the perfect 10. Well thankfully I have the curiosity of cat  in which will motivate me to swim in uncharted waters. I am going to test the fabric of social interaction with the better half by me randomly approaching local beauties with the intention of asking them simple straight forward questions about social interaction and men, Malaysian men. I know this rather sounds obtuse but do continue to read.

     Before I a get verbal crucifixion from all you ladies and some men, I would like to point out that beauty lies in the eyes of the beholder. This entire whatever you want to call it is more like a personal experiment of mine. I understand that some people might find this offensive and I personally understand that beauty is much deeper than a pretty face. But let’s face the fact that there is a hypocrite in everyone. I have a personal analogy that I think will give you an idea of what I am trying to convey. “If you come across a flower; a flower that has features that are so revolting that it causes an eye sore and it makes you think twice to pick it up and smell it for the flower it is; would you honestly pick it up and smell its godly fragrance?” If you are one of those individuals who ignore the physical appearance of it and smell it for the flower it is then kudos to you, you’re on a level that I think very few humans achieve. I write this for the men who think impulsively, you know the way their programmed to observe prominent female physical features that corresponds to fertility (which sadly includes me), so help us guys help you ladies. I hope that all you gorgeous ladies (whatever you may look like) keep an open and exciting mind.

     My main idea is to try to understand a women’s perspective. I know you get all this famous magazines that have all the research on how a man should court a woman, personal interviews and blah blah blah, but how much does this help. I am trying to make this simple and straight forward, approaching this like a reality show which focuses on the everyday women. It will be my humble attempt to try to get tips, insights, advice or whatever information that will come in handy for us guys.

     Besides the fundamental idea of approaching a woman, I would also like to curb the social stigma surrounding beautiful women that I feel some men and women have. I put a safe bet that there are vast quantities of men who have initial negative impressions towards pretty faced beauties at first sight; this is the scenario that some women have told me personally. Too my conclusion, I think that naturally if we can’t have or get something that we really want, we tend to give up and almost always put a negative barrier towards us and that something. Some guys when they feel that they can’t approach a women, will often end up making statements such as, “She is a gold digger”, “She  must be really high maintenance”, “I bet she sleeps around”, “Look at the way she dresses, she must want all the attention” and/or “She wears too much makeup”. I must admit that I am no saint; I have honestly passed such comments and probably would still say such things without really thinking deeply. I am not trying to criticize anyone; I am just trying to shed some light on the subject. We are human after all.

     One last thing I would like to point out, I would not just go for pretty faces at every opportunity I get, I would try to look for intellectuals, people who have a good attitude and people who have character. So please do stay tuned on my social adventure.

 The Experiment

Rather sophisticated I know, anyhow this brainchild of mine is going to be conducted as follows:-

•    My personal target is to approach 100 Malaysian women; it all depends on the hopefully positive feedback I get from this.
•        I am going to approach some attractive ladies around KL for me to ask some questions, fingers crossed I hope I don’t get a five finger salute.
•       The questions and answers will be revealed after each successful interview so to speak.
•       The juicy bits, each individual beauty are going to be numbered on what I call an attractive index and a financial wealth index.
•       The attractive index will include attributes such as; 1) Attractive, 2) A notch above attractive, 3) Literal Head Turner, 4) Magazine cover material, 5) Scarlett Johansson, she is what Aphrodite should be in my opinion.
•     Every woman that I sort of interview will have to rate themselves. Their own rating will be compared against my own rating towards them and the final score will be the mean average. Just to get a broader perspective.
•       The Wealth scale will be rated solely by them. This scale will represent the financial status of each interviewed ladies. The guys reading this will have a clearer picture on the participants from a financial stand point.
•        The Wealth Scale; 1) Moderate income, 2) Means to live comfortably, 3) Living above needs.
•   NO PERSONAL INFORMATION will be displayed, the interviews are completely anonymous.
•      All the ladies that are interviewed will be numbered. For example No.1, No.2 No.3 and until the number 100.
•        This Numbers will also represent the main title for each interview session.

     It will be my personal satisfaction that this guide will help narrow the gap on social misconceptions that I think a lot of us have and more importantly help guys smoothly approach the ladies (Don Draper style). I also hope that this guide will help make Malaysian men and women more at ease with their self-esteem and help nurture a more matured sense of respect and understanding for both polarities. More importantly I really hope you guys whoever you may be really enjoy my alphabetical artistry. Please feel free to contribute your ideas or ask me any questions regarding this guide, as I greatly appreciate the feedback. Throughout the course of this experiment I am guessing that some of the initial concepts of this experiment will be altered in accordance with response I receive. Now let’s get to the business end of things shall we!